The Scary Unknown future.

Becouse im finally starting to think awhole lot about my future more seriously then i ever did before, i cant continue just hanging around the houses and doing nothing while waiting for my course to continue or whatever and get away with it. Im 19 this month, hahahah and as young as that sounds getting a secure job isnt as far as it sounds....especially after the years of study your going to be doing before that.

And no i dont picture myself working at all in the hotel line in the future, ive always wanted to do something different...unique....or whatever.In truth its my sayang thats helped get a few things i needed to get realised in my life......we've already gone out a few times and so and ide like to know i can afford to take her out, to buy her flowers now and again....to take her places and drive by her place when i want too without waiting for a cab. 19 and i already feel responsible for her...haha...*sigh*.

I've decided not to join this DCHL Network Marketing plan (for now at least).....first of all as great as it sounds i have no clue in doing business and if i ever did consider doing it it would be later on when i have a job and know alot more about it....and yea....thats that. Hey if theres rezeki then its not going anywhere.

Im seriously considering resitting for my SPM this/next year to improve my grades and get in Physics and consider doing the pilot course my best friend aifiq is doing.I've always liked flying or being in a plane...and you get to travel the world....well only at airports but still. And no its that im dumping one thing becouse im bad at what im doing and going for something else (Which in a very very small way is) but i want to start fresh again......i want to study hard and do everything right again, fark im only 19 so studieng a few months and getting results that could change the way my future went seems like a very very small price to pay.

And i wouldnt say i wasted a whole year, i did a certificate in hotel management...i learned something if not that much and i made friends. We shall see how it goes......im going to discuss this with my parents and ask on what they think. It would be great if i could do this years SPM but im afraid i wont have much time since its in november and its already july, which gives me roughly around 5 months.

But i think if i really took the 5 months seriously and studied hard i can do it. Nadia has been wonderful in all this.....last nite when i thought i had already decided on doing this DCHL she was very supportive and said if this is what i really wanted to do then i should go for it. Of course i havent told her about the spm thing yet....err yea wonder what she will think of that?
*grin*.


Anyway shes in singapore now, she left this morning by bus with her mom and no doubt they spent the whole day doing what girls do in singapore...land of shopping. Gahhhh i havent topped up so i havent been able to reply the sms's shes been sending telling me what shes been up to. God i miss her so much, it would take 2 second having a converstaion with her to make me laugh or smile....she just makes me feel amazingly happy. Ive promised myself to do whatever i can to make her happy....and pinch myself every morning to make sure this isnt a dream. I love this girl so much........its....its......



Beyond words....I love you Nur Nadia nyaz Ahmad....so much


You could say being with her that you could have had your house burned down...been robbed.....just got fired all in the same day, and know things are still gonna be okay or smile hahahah couse as im picturing it now shes sitting next to me with that smile on her face saying "Well at least you have your health". = =


- Ok there is no point is keeping this on hold so as soon
as my parents come back im gonna talk it over with them.......i really have to start thinking
about what exactly i want with life, and the sooner i figure that out the better...and im
preety sure doing nothing wont help. *smile*. Anyway.....wish me luck....with my whole damn life hehe..



PS: Missing you loads empress ~

Yours truely,
Ali. XXXX Lotsa kinky love.